Episode #37: How To Support Your Entrepreneurial Significant Other with Christian Castro
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This episode gets personal. Today’s episode guest is Christian Castro, Design Director of What Do You Meme? and significant other to The Toy Coach. Christian and Azhelle have an off the cuff conversation about finding ways to support and motivate your entrepreneurial significant other. How do you tell your partner that you want to start a toy business? How do you overcome imposter syndrome together? Find the answers to these questions and many more. Being an entrepreneur isn’t easy but being a supportive spouse can make the experience a whole lot lighter.
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Connect With Christian on LinkedIn.
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Azhelle
You were listening to Making It in The Toy Industry, Episode Number 37.
Intro/Outro + Jingle
Welcome to Making It in The Toy Industry, podcast for inventors and entrepreneurs like you. And now your host Azhelle Wade
Azhelle
Hey there, people Azhelle Wade here and welcome back to another episode of Making It in The Toy Industry. This is a weekly podcast brought to you by thetoycoach.com. Today is a very special day because I decided to do something a little bit different this week. And I actually went off of my planned episode schedule to record a very special episode with my loving boyfriend, Christian Castro, who also works in the toy industry. Welcome to the show, Christian.
Christian
Hey, thank you for having me on. He took the 37 episodes.
Azhelle
Wow, why blowing up my spot? Well, Christian actually has no idea why he's on the show today. And I didn't really give him much of a heads up. But I actually I wanted to talk about what it feels like to be the significant other of somebody starting their own business? Hmm.
Christian
Interesting topic. Okay. I was not expecting that.
Azhelle
Yeah, I know. Yeah, I know, you weren't expecting that. And, you know, the reason I want to talk about this is because, you know, it's been really hard to be The Toy Coach, and do all the things I'm doing. And it's been really great to have you as my support during all of that and doing all of that. And I don't know, I just feel like you deserve a platform. And I feel like other women or even men listening to my podcast that are starting small businesses on the side, maybe side hustles or maybe they're starting full-time entrepreneurial ventures, you know, they have significant others or spouses that might be going through some of the things that you are going through, and I'd love to talk a little bit about that.
Christian
Let's do it. I'll talk, no idea what to say. But if you ask questions, I will give you answers.
Azhelle
Okay. All right. Let's see. So tell me this Christian Castro, tell me, how did you feel? The moment that I said, I'm going to go off on my own and I think I'm gonna start a business.
Christian
I will say that I was not surprised. You always had an entrepreneurial mindset and entrepreneurial background with your mom being a business owner in her own right. So I, I always felt it was only a matter of time until you went off on your own and pursued pursued your dream of being your own boss. I guess it was just a matter of when and what exactly you were going to pursue.
Azhelle
Yeah, I mean, I do have to say you weren't you weren't really scared at all, were you?
Christian
No, no, because I feel like you always find success in everything you do. So if I can help and support in any way, if anything, I'm just gonna increase that success.
Azhelle
Yeah, what's really interesting is, you know, there wasn't really much of a plan. I feel like still no, there's still not a plan. It's more like taking opportunities as they come and just seeing where they go and, and following, you know, I got in my heart, my and, you know, my talents. And it, I don't know, I just, sometimes I have a hard time believing in myself. So it's amazing to me that you can be so I'm like so sure. So what were some of the things that made you so sure?
Christian
Well, I feel like a lot of people, especially those in the creative field, they tend to either have this go to attitude, confidence, like go getter mindset, but not necessarily the experience or the skill set or the resources and some people are the opposite. They have like the talent, the skills, the education, but they don't have the attitude, the the positive optimism that you you kind of need to really get going in when it comes to starting your own business. I feel like you definitely had a combination of both but you definitely for the first and foremost had the experience and the skill set and the knowledge to talk about everything it is you're talking about right now. The only thing lacking was a bit of a push, the motivation, the encouragement that I as the supportive boyfriend could provide. So why not provide that for you? And then it would be the complete package?
Azhelle
No, it wasn't the complete package already close.
Christian
That secret ingredient like I say you just need a little bit push. Yes, the confidence. I
Azhelle
wonder like what what advice would you give to other spouses or significant others that are out finding their their partners want to take on either a side hustle that might take away a lot of time from from them and from their relationship, or want to just step away from their jobs full time and start a new business, like what advice would you give?
Christian
I would say, know when to be there for them and know when to just get out of the way and let them do what they need to do. For the most part, you have been on autopilot since you started this, you know exactly what to do and how to do it. And when you don't, you're usually pretty good at asking for help. And I'm more than willing to offer my help. Besides that, I will also say that even the most confident, skilled, knowledgeable person will need some encouragement from time to time and will need a reminder of how much they know, every one I've ever met in this industry, and probably every industry goes through imposter syndrome so that you yourself included. Yeah, I've gone through that. I know you've gone through that. I'm alerting our listeners, we're listening. There are listeners now I'm here. My episode. our listeners don't know that about about Azhelle Wade, but she herself has had, and probably still has from time to time imposter syndrome,
Azhelle
for sure. I mean, I've, you know, it's hard, it's hard to, you know, you don't know all the answers. And nobody knows all the answers. And and you know that and everybody knows that. But then you you get you get a platform or you build a platform for yourself, and you start to feel like you have to have all of the answers and you start to feel guilty if you don't have an answer. And that is definitely the moments when I felt imposter syndrome. And you were always just like, reminding me of what all the things I do know. And it'd be really funny because I'd be like, what I don't know what to do, and he just be like, but don't you know this? Haven't you done that? And I'd be like, Well, yeah. And then they're like, Well, what about this project you did last year? Didn't you just like do that? Or? And I'd be like, Yeah, but what is that? That has nothing to do? And then I'm like, Okay, yeah, I guess you know, when you go through it like that, and you start to list all my accomplishments and skills and experiences. Yeah, okay, I guess it's a thing. But
Christian
I mean, you get so immersed in what you're doing that you sometimes forget to take a step back and really review everything you've done and actually analyze and like, reflect upon everything you've already accomplished thus far, like in your case, just in the few months that you've been doing this, right. Like the fact that you have literally never missed a week for your weekly podcast. I listen to a lot of podcasts and a lot of them take breaks.
Azhelle
taking breaks. A lot of people don't know this, but Azhelle is a team of one person. I have a VA, she has some yes, some freelancers on the side, but the toy coaches full time just one employee, right. So especially in the beginning, she was writing, recording and editing every single one of her episodes long before Oh, well.
Christian
I was beginning to write those email, intros email blast.
Azhelle
The conclusion and the conclusion. I'm really good at starting things. I start a business. I'm like, my struggle is finishing them.
Christian
Yeah. And that's that's one of the supportive partner comes into play. Right helps them finish off. Yeah, I so I kind of want to talk a little bit about money. Okay. Right. Like, no, I mean, not just money, but also like what money means because, you know, okay, I took a huge, I made a huge decision to step away from a large position at a company that had worked for and worked and they could work trick to get up to that level, and to make a certain amount of money and to leave that. Did that scare you? Because that might mean, your plans that you might have you with me are delayed now. So how did you feel about that? That part of the decision? Yeah, well, again, maybe I just have so much confidence in you that I figured it was only a matter of time till you were matching what you made at your previous job and then surpassing it. And I mean, maybe that's this, like blissful ignorance or maybe it's just like, a genuine belief that you were and are going to succeed at what you're doing right now. And on top of that, I've always been the type of person that not to sound cliche, but I know money does not buy happiness. And that being said, I know you were accustomed to a certain type of lifestyle.
Azhelle
I am not bad.
Christian
Azhelle is a very fancy person. For those who don't know her.
Azhelle
I do my own hair.
Christian
She does her own hair, but everything else she has. She has expectations right standards, which is not a bad thing by any means. You know your worth and that's important, but for me, I find that I had humble beginnings. So I just put it in those terms. But for me, I understand that you don't need a lot to be happy. And on top of that, I know that most small businesses do not make profit their first year out, they don't even break even their first year out. So you kind of have to take a step backwards before taking three or four steps forward. So I just viewed the next few months as you taking that step backwards in order to regroup and then launch yourself forward.
Azhelle
I don't know. I mean, I feel like there are probably listeners out there that are thinking like, there is no way my partner would support. There is no way and like, what like? I don't know, I almost I'm thinking what advice, or what, what there had to have been something that I showed you, or a display to you that gave you this confidence. And I want to get to what the root of that is, because maybe that's something that other people can show or display to their spouses to gain their confidence for them to like, you know, go off on an entrepreneurial dream or invest some of their savings into building a toy business?
Christian
Well, I think it's similar to what you have spoken about in some of your other episodes of like, what is a good product? What makes your product unique? How do you research market trends and know your competition and figure out what problem is your product actually trying to solve? And in this case, or at least when this started off your product was your podcast, your knowledge, your persona, selling yourself as a brand, in order to educate up and coming inventors and entrepreneurs. So for me, I knew because I too work in the toy and game industry, I knew that there is a problem in the sense that the industry is very closed, it's very close knit. There's a lot of people trying to break into it, who don't know how and us who have been in the industry for as long as we have, kind of forget what that's like, because we're so like immersed in this bubble that is a toy industry where everyone kind of knows everyone, and you don't know anyone not in the industry. And so it becomes almost incestuous because the same people are being hired from the same companies. And it's kind of like musical chairs of who's working where, meanwhile, there's hundreds and thousands of people outside that bubble trying to break their way in. And I feel like that is a niche that needed to be filled. And that was something you were addressing. And I thought like, if you don't solve this problem, somebody else will and I haven't seen anyone else successfully do it to the point where they become like the mainstream go to person for people trying to break into the toy industry. So in that sense, I felt like it was a great idea that needed to be executed, which I'm sure a lot of partners would agree that their significant other also has a great idea. But I guess I'm biased in the sense that I was already in the industry. So I can confirm that your idea was something that needed to be done. It's something that the industry needed that the world needed.
Azhelle
So it's almost like you have like proof of concept. Like Yes, like with a toy idea. When you're starting a toy business, you want to research and make sure that like the market needs your concept and how much they're willing to pay for it. And you believed in this, not just because you believed I could do anything. But because you believe that it was a good idea.
Christian
I mean, it might sound again, like I'm biased because I work in the industry. So I had like insider information. But I don't think that's exclusive. To me, I think the message I'm trying to give is there's something that you might be trying to solve that your partner can be within the same target audience or someone who has a similar problem. He could be like a stay at home mom, who is trying to struggle to teach your kids now that everyone's at home learning. And your partner can be your husband who's going through the same problem. Obviously, it's the same kid. He's also trying to teach his daughter who has a learning disability how to do math problems, and then the mother happens to come up with a great toy or game idea. And if your significant other agrees with you, and finds it an amazing idea, and they use it successfully to help teach their kids, then that in itself is like you have a built in focus group with your partner. So why is that not? Why would that not be a valuable asset? Yeah. So I feel like I was someone who agreed that what you're doing was something that needed to be done. And I think anyone listening can agree to that if their partner agrees that what they're doing is something that needs to be done, then yes, I think that's something that the partner can attest to.
Azhelle
Yeah. Yeah, for sure. I'm wondering, what what do you think has been like the Let's start with the bad so we can end with a good What? What do you think has been the worst apart because we've we've been doing this all working from home because of COVID. Even working from home, I've been working from home, I was unemployed at home. And then I was doing this at home. I know you don't like to stay unemployed because you're like, No, you started do your own thing, whatever an entrepreneur.
Christian
Yeah, okay, I have to say this. When you say you're unemployed, you start your own business, you're not unemployed, you're working for yourself, right? You could open up a restaurant, and if you have zero customers, right, it is still your job. You still wake up every day and go to your restaurant. This is your restaurant.
Azhelle
This is my rescue.
Christian
And that goes for any business owner listening to this, this is your job. Don't tell anyone You're unemployed.
Azhelle
Okay? Yes. What is what was the worst part of doing this with me in quarantine, every day at home as I'm starting.
Christian
I mean, I honestly don't have any issues with sharing a space with you while you're trying to start your business. I'll admit, a one bedroom apartment in New York City seems smaller when you're there 24 hours a day with another person. And you're always showing up in the background of my zoom meetings at work and vice versa. But besides that, yeah, I think it's just we're very respectful of each other's space and time and our work and you know that I have a job also that I need to do. And yeah, I'm respectful of your job. And I treat your business venture as a job as like,
Azhelle
yeah, I guess that's a great point to make, like, respective is the business venture, like he really does treat it like it's my job. And I don't know if that just because he's so busy, like doing his job during the day, so he doesn't bother me.
Christian
So that is a an important thing to make note of like, you need to make sure you're treating it like a job when your partner wakes up and just walks to their computer, they're going to work right there. Don't bug them. Don't text them. Don't say hey, let's Yeah, runs the grocery store. Like they're at work, just like you're at work just like you would walk to the office or drive or take the subway to the office. They're doing their own thing. Their office just happens to be their apartment or wherever it is. They're starting their their toy company.
Azhelle
Right? And what what would you say has been the best thing about working together while this is all been building?
Christian
Just enjoy seeing you more.
Azhelle
I mean, well, while the business has been Oh,
Christian
okay. Well, the business
Azhelle
Not the relationship.
Christian
I love just staring at you. But yeah, while the business has been growing, I enjoy seeing like each step of the way, how much you've grown, and how much your business has grown, how much your followers and your listeners and your podcast downloads, just watching the numbers go up just, it's just kind of validation that all the work you're putting into it is for something and it's working, right and simple as that everything you're doing is working. And you need to keep doing it. And every time you succeed, and you book another guest, and when you really want to have on your show, or you get another email or a message, or a review of someone saying that what you're doing on your podcast is helping I love that. Yeah, that's and I see that puts a big smile on your face. And it's genuine happiness because you're genuinely doing this to help people. Yeah, yeah. And you've helped me along the way. I've been in the industry for a few years now. And I still learned something. Yeah, around the same time. I still learn something new in every episode.
Azhelle
Yeah. Oh, really? Yeah, you do? Yeah. I make him listen all my episodes, and he tells me all the mistakes and I freak out. And then I have to rush and try to fix them. And I'm like, no one heard that. Right. Like no one heard the bad version. No. Good version. Now they'll be like, I'll repeat the same word like three times. We have to edit it out. It's so bad. But um,
Christian
I've got questions. Oh, gonna
Azhelle
you got questions.
Christian
When are you gonna interview me? Like formally and invite me to be?
Azhelle
Yeah, I'm good to have you on the show.
Christian
I have a lot. I could talk about.
Azhelle
I'm only one person. Okay, I can barely plan for next week. Okay, I'm trying my best. All right. Would you want to come on the show and talk about?
Christian
Oh, well, where do I begin?
Azhelle
Well, I get so many thoughts.
Christian
So I would definitely want to talk about something something involving the games sector of the toy game industry. I for those of you who don't know, your intro, just fact that I'm your boyfriend. So sorry.
Azhelle
Well, I said that you work in the industry. Yeah. Okay. She works for What do you mean?
Christian
I'm the design director,
Azhelle
Director at What do you meme? Yes. And last year, he won a taggie Award for art and visuals of the year for new phone who dis right? Yes, it was awesome. He brought home that trophy for What do you meme?
Christian
So now it's in the background of your Instagram Live?
Azhelle
Yes. In the background. You'll see if you're part of truckers Academy, you'll see it and it's time for
Christian
Please join the Toys Creators Academy now.
Azhelle
This is my business
Christian
the time of this recording. He's gonna launch very soon,
Azhelle
please support black businesses, yes.
Christian
Black business owners with Latino boyfriend saying I would love to talk about games. I did a panel discussion at the non pub conference a few weeks ago where I was giving the five. Was it pitching techniques for inventors to pitch games? Yeah, I work as the design director. But from time to time, I also receive game pitches from different game inventors, specifically for party games. So I have a lot of knowledge in that area. And yeah, I see a lot of great pitches and some not so good pitches. So I would love to talk about that in more detail.
Azhelle
All right, I guess we'll have to have you back on the show.
Christian
And of course, I know a lot about design, product design and package design, and just fun play patterns for games. So yeah, I got some. Yeah,
Azhelle
got some stories, you got stories, I just, you know, this week, because of the launch is insane. This week, if you don't know, and you're listening, it's the launch of Toy Creators Academy, which is my new online digital course. And it's been a lot of work. And it's been a lot of pressure. And there's a lot going into this. So you've been such an incredible support. I just, you know, honestly, cathartically I wanted to talk about this. But then the more I thought about it, the more I just felt like there might be other people since starting a toy business is so expensive and time consuming, and difficult and confusing. If my listeners are entrepreneurs, or even inventors, they would find value and understanding how a couple navigates one person not bringing in income that they used to or maybe any income while the other person kind of carries the weight. So I don't know, it meant a lot for for me for you to be here and have this discussion. And I really appreciate your support. And I just want to let you know, toy people, like none of this would be possible without Christian support.
Christian
It's not true.
Azhelle
It's kind of true, though. It's cut, there have been many a night where I'm like, you know what, this is just not happening? And he is just like, Yes, it is, we're gonna just finish. So I hope that you all have a just as supportive of a spouse as or, you know, we're not you just as supportive as a part of a partner. I do want to get any angry phone calls from your family, like, you got married, what happened? Um, but yeah, you know, like, I hope that if you guys choose to start your own toy businesses, that you can come to an understanding with your partner and find the support that you need, I would not do any kind of business like this without without having my partner support. I don't think it would be possible it'd be really unhealthy. And, yeah, that's that's kind of what I want to do on the show for today. Okay, yeah,
Christian
I will say to all the wives, husband, boyfriend, girlfriends, partners of business owners, we can start our own club with a shorter name than what I just said. Yeah, sometimes something is as small as sharing a Facebook post can make the biggest difference. Yeah, sometimes just asking someone you know, who knows someone who knows someone. Mm hmm. For like an intro call or a contact or information? Like there's a lot of small things you can do that can help? Yeah, tremendously. Yeah, to your partner success. So just keep that in mind. You don't have to be an expert in the toy industry to help them if they need a focus group. Maybe your coworker has a 12 year old that can answer some questions via email. Or maybe you just happen to see an Instagram video that might inspire an idea and you just forward it to your partner just like small little things make a big difference. So keep that in mind in case who you are supportive, but you also feel helpless. Because you're not experienced in dolls or action figures or board games or whatever it is your partner is trying to do. Just know you can help in many different ways Everyone has their own strengths and advantage that they may not realize. So keep that in mind.
Azhelle
That's a great point. I have it now. Did you ever feel helpless during my process?
Christian
Oh, yeah. Yeah. hopelessness. It's it's sometimes helplessness is just a masked version of imposter syndrome. Yeah, I can't help but you don't know how. Yeah, you don't know that. You might already be helping.
Azhelle
Yeah. Oh, that's a good point. Just
Christian
by being there. You could be helping. Mm hmm.
Azhelle
Definitely. Yeah. Thank you so much for coming on the show Christian family beyond it is a surprise but it was definitely I didn't tell him anything like at all
Christian
I thought we were doing a soundcheck.
Azhelle
I was actually about to edit another episode, so we were not doing a soundcheck. This is probably my episodes. So I hope
Christian
you like it. Nice. I didn't curse at all. Okay nice.
Azhelle
Well until next time, I'll see you later toy people.
Christian
Play the jingle!
Intro/Outro + Jingle
Thanks for listening to Making It in The Toy Industry podcast with Azhelle Wade, head over to thetoycoach.com for more information, tips and advice
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🎓Learn more about how you can develop and pitch your toy idea with Toy Creators Academy® by clicking here to visit toycreatorsacademy.com and join the waitlist.
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